Loss of a loved one.
I have always been someone who considered themselves ‘comfortable’ with death. I rarely cry, and when I do it’s not because the person or animal had died, but in response to the grief I see from others. I am an emotional person, yet for me, death is not something to really cry about.

Yet, yesterday I could not stop crying.

Fluffy was my pet. Well, technically he was my son’s pet, but I took on the two guinea pigs (Mike and Fluffy) declaring them as my children’s pets, but deep down I considered them mine. Well I was the one who was going to be looking after them. And then Fluffy got sick. I didn’t expect the expensive trips to the vets, nor the extended dedicated care I’d have to give when I took on the ‘easy-to-look-after’ pets, but that’s what I was dealt with. Often I’d find myself feeling resentful over the fact that something that I got for free, and would cost me $10 to replace was causing me so much expense and effort - yet how much is a life worth?

I must admit, I was greatly relieved when I found my Fluffy still on the bottom of his cage, looking as though he was taking a nap, on Sunday evening. I knew that it meant the end of squeezing out his pooh for him, the squealing out in pain as his brother tried to huddle next to him for warmth. The endless attention and care. Yet, at that moment I also came to realise how much he actually meant to me. I loved him.

And it was at that moment the flood gates were unleashed. I cried. I cried for Fluffy. I cried for all that he had endured. I cried for his release. I then found that I cried for the loss of every loved one, be it human or fur-friend that I had experienced throughout my life, right from the first death I experienced when I was 18 - when I was told to ‘get over it’.

It’s funny how words can impact so much on how you respond to things. I no longer wanted to deal with the pain of losing someone I loved, so I became apathetic about death - wrapped up in the concept of being ‘comfortable’ with it. I didn’t allow myself to feel that pain and masked it with caring for others. I felt brave and strong. Yet I didn’t release.

Releasing is good. It allows you to truly move on.

Yes, I felt sad at losing my loved pet. Yes, I still do feel sad. But letting myself feel that pain felt good. Crying felt good (despite the acid burn I’ve been getting from my tears of late). It was released and I am now free to focus on moving forward without my Fluffy. Who is now resting in peace - free from the pain this life had bought him. 


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In light of the sad loss of Robin Williams…
It pains me when I read about and hear people calling suicide selfish. On the surface suicide may seem thoughtless and selfish, but when someone is at that point in their life their actions are genuinely following their love for others. They honestly feel as though it will be a service to those they love if they were gone. Their self worth is non existent.

I have been there before and despite having love and support from those you love, it can be hard. This is a terrible world and there comes a point when even a single comment from someone who you hardly know (and in some cases not at all) can be that final straw that breaks all logic within you. The demons take over and you are certain that you are doing everyone a service by removing You and the negative energy you’ve become, because there is no way that you can see to change it - and believe me, you’ve tried.
It takes more than a simple ‘are you okay?’, It takes more than a ((hug)), to fix it. These actions and words do offer doorways to step through and find guidance to finally escape those dark cycles, but not everyone will see the opportunity. Not everyone will get what they need and the more often one returns to the darkness, the harder it becomes to believe it’s even possible to break free from it.
The stigma of mental health needs to be removed. The help avenues need to be more readily available and people just need to pause. People need to remember that EVERYONE has their own story and what you say next to them could be that final straw that consolidates their lack of self worth and confirms that their loved ones will be better off without them.
Suicide is NOT a selfish act. It is a heartbreaking act. Suicide is a terminal symptom of an all too common condition that should be treatable. It’s time society grew up and started respecting one another and helping one another instead of the true selfish act here, which is looking after one’s own agendas.


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Card of the Week - Opportunity
Doors are always being presented.  You are in control of which ones you choose to open and walk through.”

At any moment, we are being presented with opportunities.   With every choice we make, there are choices we didn’t make.

This card encourages us to recognise and explore all the opportunities that we are presented with.   Do not allow yourself to get caught up in situations where you are feeling lost and not directed, as you are the one that is in control with your life.  

Decide what it is you want to achieve and then move towards your goal.   Make the choices that work towards these goals and be open to the opportunities that are presented - because sometimes they offer you an amazing means to reach your goals that you may have never even considered beforehand.

(Illustrations from The Energy Oracle)

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Card of the Week: Queen of Swords
I decided to use a different deck for this week’s ‘Card of the Week’.  

Earlier this year, I sponsored a kickstarter project by Paul Michael Kane, which resulted in me owning this wonderful deck!   I already owned Paul’s Konxari deck, so looked forwards to owning this one - and I was far from disappointed.  The images in the deck are glorious, and despite being a standard playing deck, demonstrate the energies that come through when using them for divination purposes in a very strong manner with his choice of imagery.

Today, I drew the Queen of Spades.    This is equivalent to the Queen of Swords in a Tarot Deck.    This suit is one that represents logic and focus, with the queen focusing particularly on honesty.

When I first looked at this card with my mum, we both saw different things.   She saw a girl holding a baby or perhaps an oyster shell.  I saw an angel reading a book.   So what can they mean?  

Traditionally, the Queen of Swords (or in this case Spades) will encourage the reader to focus on their own truths.   She encourages commitment and focus.   Coupled with our own noted symbolism, the holding of a baby can remind you that what you have is precious and that with love and nurture you can develop your dreams.   The oyster shell gives a similar connotation - with the pearl being created with dedication and focus.  And finally, the angel reading the book adds the element of having faith and belief in yourself.

So this week, we are being encouraged to commit to our goals and believe in ourselves.  

(Illustrations from Foto Grafis Playing cards used with permission of Paul Michael Kane, Award winning photographer and graphic designer)

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I asked my tarot cards what would happen if I asked this boy on a date and I drew the 6 of pentacles. What would you say that means?

Hi Anonymous,

What do you think it means?

When I teach tarot reading, I embrace the concept that symbolism means different things to each person, so the card chosen for the answer will depend on the person who is drawing it.  In addition to this, there are MANY tarot decks out there, and each will bring different symbolism to the forefront for different people.

So the answer really lies within YOU.

Have a look at your six of pentacles.   What stands out for you?  Did you draw it the right way up, or was it reversed?   If it was reversed, did it bring a particular component to the forefront for you?  What do the colours of the card mean for you?

Have a look at the 6 of pentacles from the Rider-Waite deck (which serves as a good teaching deck as it has the basic symbolism that is often found as a standard across all tarot decks)


What do you see?  The first thing that I notice is that there are people begging.   Would asking this boy out come across as begging?  Have you approached the subject before?  Do you come across as needy?  If not, this may serve as a reminder to be mindful of these things.

The next thing I notice is that the ‘main character’ in the card seems to be fair (scales) and giving (passing of the bread to the beggars).  This boy is a kind person.  He may say/do things as not to hurt you, even if he doesn’t feel them.  

If *I* was to draw this card for you, with your question in mind, I would be encouraging you to ensure that you are doing things for the right reasons.   You need to take things slowly and get to know each other well, as there is a chance that you’ll both be caught up in the whirlwind of it all and there will be an imbalance.   There is an indication he will say yes, but if he doesn’t, he will let you down kindly.  

~Caroline ♥

Hello! I'm feeling desperate, I've been trying to conceive for six months with no luck and I was wondering if a tarot reading could give me any answers. Love your blog, thank you for reading.

Hi Anonymous,

When I first read your question,  I didn’t know how I wanted to respond.   My Q&A section (via Tumblr) is not intended as a reading platform, so I don’t answer those types of questions, but I am not entirely sure if you were asking me to give you the answer or not.   So I stepped back and looked at the question.  And your question asks if it is possible.

So in answer to your question, YES.  It is possible.  Tarot can give you guidance on what you need to do to help you conceive.   But there are other barriers, such as how you pose the question, and whether the reader will choose to answer such a question.

If you are asking if you WILL conceive, then chances are you are not going to get an answer, and if you do, it might not make sense.  If you ask for guidance in regards to improving your chances, the may come across as cryptic - for in most circumstances, this is messing with nature and nature doesn’t like to be messed with….  which may be the problem in the first place.

While you are being driven to desperation ‘trying’ to conceive, you are putting up barriers.  It is a matter of discovering those barriers and learning how to work around them.   Some may involve means that you do not have current access to.  Perhaps it’s just not ‘your time’.   Maybe you’re just ‘trying’ too hard.

Yes, you can gain guidance to help you in this are from the Tarot.  But be open to how you receive it.

~Caroline ♥
#question #facebook

I’m curious!


How many decks do you own? What’s the most recent one you bought?

I have about 10 Tarot Decks and over 30 Oracle Decks.    I also have 2 Tarot and 1 Oracle decks in the post.


She Grew Up Mormon And Carried A Big Secret For Most Of Her Life

Eri tells her story with confidence and clarity, which is part of the reason we watched this 15-minute short doc without realizing how quickly the time had passed. 

Card of the week - Seven of Swords
I find it interesting that I drew this card today, as it is one I often associate with limited time.   I view the item in the crow’s mouth as a pocket watch, which makes me think about the fact that our time is precious or we are running out of time.   Given that I was going to introduce this post with a ‘sorry this card of the week is late’, I do find it amusing that the universe has told me that I am running out of time!

Another interesting thing that is standing out for me, after I photographed the image, I have noticed that the shading on the crow has come up looking very much like the image of a dog.  I am not sure if anyone else can see it?   It is not something I have ever noticed before, but is it noticeable on the card itself too (it’s not just a lighting affect).  If feels as though a dog is staring right at me!

Usually this card is one that represents procrastination and hiding from the shadows, yet it seems that the shadows on this card have been illuminated for me and I can see so many things differently, so I am going to interpret it differently today.

I am noticing a moon in the background, with three swords in it.   This remind me of the three of swords (which is similar, but with a heart) and this speaks of heartache.  The image of the dog represents friendship and companionship.   I am sensing that this week we are being encouraged to take time out to mend broken friendships and heart.   It is time to let go of that which has been ailing us and to move forward in our lives.

(Illustrations from Archeon Tarot deck used with permission of U.S. Games Systems, Inc., Stamford, CT. c. 2005 by U.S. Games Systems.)

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Week 28

Happy New Week!! 

What’s your new week resolutions for the 28th week of the year?

With the 8 now adding elements of manifestation and balance to the balance and working together that is brought by the 2, this week is one that focuses heavily on balance.

The 8 is a number which is often associated with inner wisdom and karma, encouraging us to work on ourselves and our progress. This continues nicely on from last week, which was embracing our spiritual journey and life purpose.

This week, we are encouraged to continue on our spiritual journey, focusing on our self-belief and confidence so that we can recognise that which is positive in our lives. We are encouraged to ensure our thought processes are positive and that our actions also reflect this. Positive affirmations are seen to be very helpful.

~Caroline ©2014

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